IC contact

[bebest]

Zulius

You got Zulius. I'm busy being fabulous. Deposit hot goss here.

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

FROM: SUBJECT: MAXIMA Zulius...would you have time to talk... JUN Actually... I might have an idea... LYCAON Present LYNEY Hello! This is the owner/operator of the Vogue, right? ZEVRAN Your highness. DIARMUID Zulius, my friend. GILGAMESH Once again, I grace you with my sparkling presence. EDWARD Happy 21st! SAMPO Yoooo-hooo. House-visit! GIL Dearest Zulius, best of all the best... VERGIL I do wonder how you can go to sleep and... LYCAON Happy 21st birthday to you yet again. ROSE Zulius, we need to talk. ROSE Fancy a girl’s night? TAKAME Zulius, were you and Vittore still curious as to Gilgamesh's whereabouts? VERGIL & GIL Amor. I felt of all people who needed a message... VENTI Queen Bestie, I'm gonna need some mercy from... GIL Good morning, o shining beacon of Kaisou's culture and sophistication~ EDWARD Do you have one of those blue-and-purple flags... JUN Edward Kenway intended to take on the... ROSE Zulius, are you there? ZHONGLI Zulius, I'm checking in to make sure... VERGIL I have two questions for you. GIL zulius, there's no rest for the wicked... LAPIS hi, sorry that this is a bit out of the blue but DANG HENG Secret Santa TAKAME Zulius? Would it be alright if I brought you something? SHROUD Zulius, owner of the Vogue. ELLIOT & VENTI Zulius, I got a lead on a new actor to fill... EDWARD Mate, you’re good at accessories... VERGIL mi dispiace ZERO Zulius? Are you here today? VERGIL/WOLFWOOD ...Before you say anything... ZERO Something important has come up... VENTI Hey, Zules! I've got some news for you... ASH turnabout's fair play TAKAME unable to work tonight my apologies ROSE Zulius, do you have a moment? TAKAME There is something I wish to ask... RYOUTA zulius! i got some freshly brewed T E A to spill for you!

TO: SUBJECT: AIDES Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay darlings! LYCAON I, your dear sweet Papa... VENTI So hey Bestie, you can now add... VENTI BEST BESTIE??? Please tell me you're okay! VENTI Bestie forever and forever please confirm or deny. WOLFWOOD Happy B-Day Nick! VERGIL Notable day in HISTORY! KNI Hey Sweetie. I know you've been going through it... VASH Hey Sweetie. I know you've been going through it... DANTE Ding dong, this is your local fabulous zebrataur... GIL Soooooooo. What's the game plan here, Pumpkin? VASH Happy B-Day, Bestie! VERGIL Happy B-Day, Boo! DANTE Happy B-DAY Sugar Tits!!! VENTI Happy B-Day Queen Bestie!! VERGIL Baby can I come sleep with you? :( VERGIL Hey Handsome. Nick's worried that... EDWARD EDWARD KENWAY?!!!!!! ROSE Rosey this is NOT funny! VENTI SHOW 👏 ME 👏 THE 👏 RING!! VERGIL Hey so you know how they told us we REEEAAALLY shouldn't make the fae mad at us? ELLIOT Happy B-Day, Elliot! FURINA Hey Sweetie. I haven't seen you at work for a while... VERGIL Happy Valentines Day, Boo! ELLIOT Hey El. Would you do me a favour for three thousand dollars? VERGIL My turn to send you flowers VENTI OMG, Bestie! I have SO much tea... ROSE Ding dong. This is your check-up call... VERGIL H-hey, Vergil. You busy tonight? ZHONGLI & VENTI So hey, FUNNY, FUNNY thing happens to me today! VERGIL Okay, I have been SUPER nice and given you... MOXXIE Hey, Moxx! They've got OUR production of Cats... VENTI Girl, are you Shakespeare??!!!! DANTE So, is your brother just SUPER into painting or... VERGIL New Zhongli tits out statue dropped. xoxo ZHONGLI Hey, Zhongli. Can you do me a solid? ZHONGLI "Dear Zulius, my hottest and most..." ZHONGLI Ding dong Avon calling. ZHONGLI Oh look, it's ME again! ZHONGLI Heeeyyy Gorgeous. You're good at contracts and paperwork... VERGIL Hey Handsome, Madama Butterfly is on tonight VERGIL A gift!! AUGUST Haaaaaay! Takame hit me up... RYOUTA Now I've got some prime tea for YOU! TAKAME Hey you. How're you feeling?

code by cawaii

Comments

[kowase]

That, or I expect I'll find a second 'Bullet' on my desk before the evening is out and I may have to strangle him for it.

And he has. Defiled. My fridge. I am five minutes away from ordering him a mini fridge for his bedroom so I can avoid him putting his cheap 1$ pizzas next to my real mozzarella. He does not need to buy these things. I have money.

And they're not antiques. They are not. They are obselete and a dated form of data storing but they have not hit that age where they can be considered worth money due to their age.


And to put it in short, yes. I do believe he is thinking unclearly. Or, at least, thinking with thoughts that are not fully put together due to a desire to have something vs. to lose it.

...he is a very lonely person and has very few friends. I do need you to understand. You and I are rich, but he is so well off that having friends, for him, is difficult because it is difficult for him to consider them as being genuine or just wanting what he has.

Question. It is related. Trust me.
That full length mirror in your room.
Can you put it upright, but close to the floor?

[bebest]

That is also likely, yeah. But that just means you can put them on his desk. You can just pass them along between you like a fun game.

Oh, Honey. I think he's gonna keep buying them and put them in your fridge anyway. You know he's totes doing this on purpose, right? You know he's doing it because it makes you all huffy.

Thank you! I needed that. I hope you gave the people who tried to palm them off on you your best done-with-shit scowl. You know the one! The really glowery one.

[Yes he does have a whole mental index of Vergil's different scowls, thanks for asking.]

That or he's hit the worst dry spell ever and he's just desperate. That's possible too! Poor sexually repressed Gil :<

Yeah, I figured that one out pretty fast. I mean I like Gil a whole lot, but you're right, he doesn't have to worry about us being after him for his cash. We've got our OWN. Do you think this guy is after his money?

[There's a long fucking pause as Zulius looks at this request, then sighs and goes and does that. ]

The things I do for you. Okay, it's leaning against the bedroom door.

text > action

[kowase]

It will be a game that ends with me using gorilla glue to attach them to his desk. I am fully aware why he insisted on getting a soundproof door for that room. That is all I want to say on it.

He needs to stop doing things just to get my attention--negative or otherwise.
One day I'll start to get him back for it and he'll realise who is the pettiest between the both of us.

[ and that's it

thats the end of the text messages.
Because in the next few moments, when Zulius is done re-adjusting his mirror...

...Vergil is walking out of the mirror, and into Zulius' room. He pushes his phone into one of the pockets of his very Victorian coat, arms immediately folding behind his back. ]

Given the man's first post on the network read like a terrible scam ad with the intention of getting money off people who do not know better?

I do worry that his 're-connection' with Gil is not out of sincerity, but rather, out of greed.
I have seen --and dealt with--many in my life who seek friendships for gain.

1/2

[bebest]

[Zulius is about to text Vergil something filthy about Dante and his soundproofing of his office. He's about to send something terrible. Something that would require brain bleach to survive.

Luckily, Vergil chooses this moment to just FUCKING WALK OUT OF HIS MIRROR!!!!

Zulius lets out a panicked A!!!!!! sound, flailing backwards as Vergil continues talking like nothing fucking weird just happened!!! ]

[bebest]

[Okay, deep breaths.]

Oh my Goose, it was THAT guy? He was so blatantly a scammer. Like, he couldn't have done worse if he had a big neon sign flashing over him all "hey, I'm about to scam you out fo your money!"

And yeah! Gil does NOT deserve that! He deserves someone who wants to hang out with him for him, not because of his cash. You're so right, Babe, it's super sus.

[And then, because it has to be said: ]

Sooooo we're just gonna- we're just gonna gloss over the mirror thing, huh?

[kowase]

More than blatantly. I feel he was a walking warning, and yet, now he lives inside the teapot in my store. [ annoyed. ]

...As for the mirror thing. I admit, I wanted to test out distance on it.

I learned I could do it a few days ago when I accidentally fell backward into my bathroom mirror when Agnus got underfoot and I had to avoid stomping on him.

...I ended up falling out of a mirror in the shop and have been curious about it ever since.
Is it not convenient? And far less troublesome than my sword.

[bebest]

Ewwwww, make sure you get like, extra locks on the real expensive antiques.

[Just in case the little scam artist is also a thief! You never know. ]

Hah, no kidding! How embarrassed were you to stumble into your shop like that? Just right out of a mirror?

[Mortifying, he'd bet. He can't see Vergil ever taking a fumble of any kind gracefully. ]

Yep, it's a lot less...hmmmm marginally terrifying that you waving a sword in the air to make portals with, TRUE. [He flashes a smirk.] Sooooo what you're saying is I should find a permanent place for one of my mirrors to be on the floor just for you to drop by? 'Cause that's what I'm hearing.

[Or choosing to hear. Same difference. ]

[kowase]

I almost feel like asking around to see if anyone has warding spells. Marking spells. Curse my wears against thieves or something of the sort.

[ huff. ]

I will not tell on myself and how startled I was, but I am more than certain by avoiding telling you, you can already imagine for yourself.

[ he was VERY startled. And took a minute just lying on the floor, staring at his own ceiling. ]

I would perhaps suggest you could move a mirror down for me. As such, I could visit far more often without having to make the timely trip over.
I believe it would benefit us both.

...

I could even use it to bring you breakfast in bed, next time.

[bebest]

I bet someone can do that! If not on the app, then TOTES someone in Undertown or somewhere.

[And then Zulius will get the fae curse ability and be able to do that FOR you, Vergil! So lucky!! At the huff, Zulius giggles a little. He makes a point of closing his eyes. ]

It's okay, if I close my eyes and think really- YUP, yep, there it is. I can see it happening. You're right, I can imagine it. It's so much fun. You're so huffy about it~

[Vergil made it so much worse than if he'd just told on himself. Zulius opens his eyes, his wicked, awful grin softening. Because honestly, that is the most adorable offer in the whole-ass world. Here he was gonna turn this into something lewd to make Vergil blush and instead he got reverse-uno'd with something actually wholesome that makes his heart flutter a little bit.

Vergil is getting distressingly good at this. ]

I think I can work with that~ It would be nice to see you more often, not gonna lie. And breakfast in bed? What a TREAT, no one's ever done that for me before. I'd offer you the same but I like you a lot and I don't wanna poison you to death.